Reîntâlnire (sau Viata si Oamenii 2)

Cartea Sandei s-a prins de mine de la primele cuvinte. Sunt putine carti pe care citindu-le sa ma faca sa imi gåsesc sufletul acolo. Dar cartea Sandei face parte dintre ele. 

S-a nimerit ca si atunci cand ne-am intalnit prima oara sa fim in acelasi timp in acelasi loc fara sa ne fi propus, de data asta chiar la la Deva orasul natal al Sandei. Si asa am primit cartea chiar din mâna ei (e drept a doua zi dupa evenimentul oficial de lansare din Deva). Cum ne-am cunoscut noi doua puteti citi in cartea ei la pagina 67 sau aici pe blog.

Revenind la carte, am citit-o dintr-o suflare in aceeasi zi in care am primit-o!

Am descoperit frustrari comune sau poate cele mai obinsuite printre români dar ceea ce m-a impresionat cel mai mult este perseverenta, insistenta, dorinta de a reusi, de a trai viata din plin caracteristca oamenilor care nu renunta usor. Am descoperit intelepciunea celui care este capabil sa se cunoasca, sa se inteleaga, sa isi construiasca si reconstruiasca eu-l dar mai ales sa se ierte si sa faca la fel cu ceilalti. Sanda explica ce inseamna sa ai o pasiune (in cazul ei jurnalismul si televiziunea) si cum aceasta pasiune i-a dat curaj sa mearga prin viata in ciuda problemelor. Ca toti oamenii intelepti intelege ca reusita este o munca de echipa amintindu-i pe toti cei care au ajutat-o de-a lungul timpului: mentorii, prietenii, amicii, colegii, sotul si mai nou propria fiica. Ba chiar le multumeste si celor care la un moment dat i-au pus bete in roate dar care in acest fel au facut-o sa continue sa se dezvolte. Desi este o carte autobiografica nu lipsesc relatari si legaturi cu momente din istoria recenta nationala si internationala si de aceea este o carte completa pentru ca prezinta cum mintea, corpul, biologia, psihologia si sociologia sunt un tot unitar si cum suntem toti influentati si in acleasi timp influentatori ai destinului propriu dar si al lumii sau comunitatii in care traim.

Cartea Sandei poate fi citita de oricine, barbati si femei de orice varsta, de cei care cred ca a reusi este privilegiul altora, ca a fi ajutat insemna ca esti slab dar si celor care au supravietuit vicisitudinilor si au reusit. Este o carte care emotioneaza dar si motiveaza, care da speranta, si chiar daca Sanda zice ca nu, da un exemplu.

Este o enorma onoare sa fiu mentionata in aceasta carte, nu pentru ca as fi avut vreo influneta in viata Sandei ci pentru ca destinul sau Dumenzeu ne-a adus impreuna intr-un moment extrem de important in viata fiecareia dintre noi. Si pentru ca am trait acel moment impreuna.

Daca vreti sa stiti mai mult despre carte, am gasit ca aici un reportaj care reda lansarea cartii la Deva: http://www.replicahd.ro/sanda-nicola-relatare-despre-propria-viata/. Dar cel mai bine, cumparati cartea si cititi-o! 

Bucuresteni la tara (sau cum sa iti iei viata in mâini)

Intr-o Românie in care din ce in ce mai multi vor sa plece, sunt unii care vor sa se intoarca sau care vor sa ramana. Pare paradoxal pentru cei deja plecati si care nu mai vor, de cele mai multe ori, nici macar sa auda de România sau de români. Unii isi exprima regretele si dorul vorbind cu alti români, participand la tot felul de activitati ale comunitatii locale, altii lacrimeaza poate in tacere si in singuratate, regretand o viata care nu mai este si un potential care nu doar ca nu a existat dar care poate nu va exista niciodata. Cei mai multi insa isi ignora sentimentele, dau delete si incearca sa mearga inainte, protejandu-se astfel de probleme emotionale sau sufletesti. 

Dar, ca o exceptie care confirma regula, sunt, cum am mentionat, oameni care vor sa se intoarca sau care nu au cautat sa plece niciodata. Facand parte din diaspora de peste 12 ani stiu ce insemana sa pleci dar astazi vreau sa vorbesc despre ce inseamna sa ramai. Si mai ales sa continui sa iti traiesti viata dupa valorile proprii, uneori impotriva curentului.

Desi ne despart 7 ani de diferenta de varsta, impartasesc cu
sora mea un trecut comun, o copilarie petrecuta in aceeasi camera intr-un apartament de 50 mp din cartierul bucurestean Salajan (astazi Grigorescu), ceva vacante la tara la bunici (ea mai putin caci bunicii au murit cand era inca destul de mica), am avut aceeasi scoala generala si aceeasi profesori, care, dupa cum era moda, o comparau in permanenta cu mine. Bineinteles, acesta perioada de viata in comun era impanata bine cu conflicte...absolut normale cand spatiul este mic, diferenta de varsta facand sa fim in perioade de dezvoltare diferite si cu nevoi diferite. Insa, situatia s-a schimbat pe cand ea termina facultatea iar eu imi retraiam a doua adolescenta in Luxembourg. La 28 de ani, in plin divort dar cu un job genial, aveam pentru prima data bani sa fiu complet independenta si sa fac ce vreau. Si ea se maturizase si uite asa am inceput sa descoperim ca aveam valori comune cum ar fi cel al traiului responsabil, al deciziilor luate in cunostinta de cauza, al respectului fata de natura si oameni, in a incerca sa faci bine daca poti si iti permiti, in a invata mereu lucruri si skillsuri noi.

Diferenta: ea nu a dorit niciodata sa plece, nici dupa terminarea facultatii, nici mai tarziu... Se spune ca in Bucuresti sunt importante oportunitati. Se prea poate si am vazut cu ochii mei cum oameni veniti din diferite colturi ale tarii, doar cu o bocceluta si impartind o camera de camin in studentie, au ajuns in maxim 10 ani sa aiba vile in zone rezidentiale ale Bucurestiului, sa sa lafaie in tot felul de masini luxoase, sa isi dea aere de destepti. Sunt putini cei care au reusit placand de la o baza sanatoasa, invatand sau fiind ajutati de parinti. Capitalismul de jungla a avantajat (si valorizat) bineinteles pe cei care fara scrupule au profitat de situatie. Sora mea insa, intelectuala si artista, incerca cu greu sa se adapteze mediului in care doar cel mai profitor reusea. A muncit in diverse joburi, a incercat chiar prin mijloace proprii sa deschida impreuna cu un prieten o librarie de carte in limbi straine (si second hand) asa cum a considerat ea ca ar trebui sa fie o librarie (business care a rezistat un an de zile). In toate joburile pe care le-a avut a pus suflet, dedicatie, o organizare si o atentie la detaliu iesite din comun si multa, multa creativitate...dar mediile prea intelectuale si artistice (atata timp cat nu sunt legate ce publicitate sau marketing, adica de business) cu greu razbesc in jungla bucuresteana. Pe an ce trecea simtea ca locul ei nu e acolo ci altundeva. Am discutat, i-am propus sa vina in Luxembourg unde sunt convinsa ca skillsurile, talentele si felul ei de a fi ar fi fost apreciate. Mi-a zis ca nu i se pare locul potrivit. 

Anul trecut a luat decizia de a se muta impreuna cu sotul ei, undeva la tara, unde sa poata avea suficient loc de gradinarit (fiind vegetariana), de gatit (la ea totul se face in casa de la paine pana la unt si mai ales de creat (este designer si decorator de interior). Undeva in natura, intr-o comunitate, undeva unde valorile artistice traditionale sunt inca prezente (lucrarea ei de diploma a fost pe arta decorativa româneasca). Dupa un an de cautari incepute in zona Buzaului (de unde vin bunicii nostri din partea tatalui) si mergand in cercuri concentrice dinspre Bucuresti catre Ardeal, a gasit o gospodarie care parea sa respecte cam toate conditiile: spatiu, pamant de gradinarit, natura, comunitate, traditii, fara a fi departe de zone turistice, infrasturctura (atat cat se poate in Romnia lui 2017). Pentru unii nu va fi o surpriza sa afle ca aceasta casa se gaseste in regiunea Tara Zarandului (judetul Hunedoara).

Si uite asa s-a hotarat mutarea in octombrie anul trecut, iar astazi, sora mea, Cosmina si sotul ei Leo sunt in masina impreuna cu herghelia lor (acvariu de pesti, o zebra australiana, un cotoi si 2 caini), in drum spre noua lor aventura: bucuresteni la tara! Voi reveni cu amanunte si sper ca si ei vor avea timp sa povesteasca cum e sa iti iei viata in maini. 

Ce esti dispus sa faci personal pentru schimbare?

Traiesc in afara Romaniei de mai bine de 10 ani si nu am pretentia sa stiu ce mai inseamna sa traiesti
in România zilelor noastre. Deci nu vorbesc din punctul acesta de vedere dar vorbesc din punctul de vedere al unui cetatean român care s-a implicat de cate ori a putut si a fost nevoie in diverse activitati voluntare pe care le-am crezut necesare la nivelul comunitatii romanesti de aici de unde traiesc. Mi-am luat responsabilitatea unor proiecte, a infiintarii unei asociatii, a organizarii unei multitudini de actiuni, care…la un moment dat sa schimbe ceva din mentalitatea româneasca. Si pot sa va spun ca este greu. De ce? Pentru ca românii se implica efectiv in afara vietii lor de familie sau a cercului social de prieteni extrem de greu, indiferent de varsta. (Personal sunt inconjurata doar de o mana de oameni care se implica, si slava domnului le multumesc de fiecare data ca exista).

Românii sunt plini de idei, sunt destepti, fac cariere, dau sfaturi, dar cand vine vorba de voluntariat este greu. Sau de a face ceva efectiv, pentru a schimba ceea ce nu le convine. Ca sa nu mai vorbim de acceptarea responsibilitatii unui proiect, fie el si doar organizarea unui eveniment. Ca sa nu mai vorbim de leadership. Iar aici toate “scuzele” cu nu am bani, adminstratia nu face sau nu drege, trebuie sa stau la coada la primarie, la platit factura de gaze etc., nu tin. Pentru ca nu exista. Totul merge struna, ceas…

Am ales sa ma implic in astfel de proiecte pentru ca ma ghideaza o filozofie de viata care zice: totul se poate pune in practica cu un minim de organizare si cu o echipa de colaboratori. Important este sa vrei, sa iti sufleci manecile si sa faci! Colaborarea, echipa este baza. Astfel, cred ca si românii vor reusi sa influenteze si sa fie recunoscuti in lumea aceasta in momentul in care vor invata sa “tina cu ai lor”, sa ii recomande, sa colaboreze. Sa aiba incredere ca si made in Romania este bun.

Intodeauna am zis ca doua creiere sunt mai bune decat unul. Si va pot spune ca dupa mai bine de 5 ani de voluntariat in cadrul comunitatii române din Luxembourg, românii accepta cu greu ca daca vrei ceva facut trebuie sa pui mana sa il faci sau sa ajuti sa il faci. Din cauza acestei atitudini (gen : nu sunt leader, ce pot eu face, trebuie sa fac mancare la barbat, sau trebuie sa bat covorul ca ma cicaleste nevasta, sau am meci de fotbal etc), este usor pentru cei care au un scop, un plan si curajul de a prelua diverse oportunitati si proiecte si a le transforma in proiect personal. (Si chiar daca nu au, vor fi acuzati de asta..asa, pe gratis si fara probe :)) Si slava domnului Luxembourgul este o tara de luat exemplu in materie de volunatariat. Statul sustine organizatiile non profit cu diverse facilitati (si nu ma refer doar la bani) dar puterea lor sta in munca voluntarilor. De la ajutor psiholigic pentru victime pana la echipe de hochei pe iarba sau promovarea femeilor, totul este facut prin asociatii. Voluntariatul face parte din cultura…dar românii nu vad, ei cred doar ca toate minunatiile din aceasta tara sunt facute de stat. NU. Nu sunt facute nici macar din iesit in strada. Sunt facute si atat.  Astfel, revin la ce ne doare in zilele acestea:

NU este de ajuns sa iti arati nemultumirea fata de un sistem iesind in strada!

Schimbarea nu se poate produce daca singurul lucru pe care esti dispus sa il faci este sa iesi in strada si sa iti arati nemultumirea. In general, starea de nemultumire, considerand ca oricine altcineva in afara de tine este vinovat, nu  poate fi productiva. Schimbarea se inatampla cand esti dispus sa faci ceva, tu personal, pentru ca lucruile sa se intample. Poate incepi cu blocul in care stai sau…Poate incepi cu iesirea in strada si incurajarea altora sa vina in strada. Este un inceput, chiar un inceput bun dar nu poate fi doar atat. Nu poate fi TOT ceea ce poti face…pe sistemul: eu macar am iesit in strada - tu ce ai facut aseara?

Sau: am iesit in strada, mi-am facut datoria…unii isi dau demisia si astept cuminte (ok, in strada, fie! Cu plancarde si tot restul..) sa fie numiti altii pentru ca eu apoi de acolo din strada cu prietenii mei sa ne aratam aprobarea sau dezaprobarea.

Chiar daca calitatile de leader sunt partial inascute, un leader nu se naste de pe o zi pe alta. Are nevoie sa isi creeze un trib, sa aiba o viziune sub care ceilati sa il urmeze. Este un proces normal, nu l-am inventat eu aici. Iar leaderul ala nu poate face nimic de unul singur oricat de inteligent si competent ar fi. Are nevoie de o echipa care sa il ajute in punerea in practica a proiectului/lor. Ba chiar, in lipsa leaderului (oricine se poate imbolnavi sau poate fi indisponibil)…sa poata conduce “barca” la tarm sau la loc sigur…

Asa ca oameni buni, care iesiti in strada…ganditi-va, ganditi-va bine! Cine va veni in loc? Care sunt liderii ce va reprezinta pe voi? Te vedi printre acesti leaderi? Ai timp sa pui umarul la treaba schimbarii si sa te tii de ea? Da? De ce nu? Si mai ales, puneti-va intrebarea: ce puteti face concret voi insiva, in afara de a iesi in strada. PASII MICI FAC SCHIMBARILE MARI!

Nimeni nu merita sa moara...

In fiecare zi in lume se intampla tragedii, oameni mor in dezastre naturale, incercand sa emigreze, in accidente de avion, de masina, de autocar, atacati de teroristi, in razboaie, in epidemii, in incendii etc de boli incurabile sau in accidente absolut stupide. Romania nu este o tara ocolita de astfel de catastrofe ...  
Oameni mor nevinovati…Oamenii mor in general pentru ca daca este ceva sigur pe lume este ca suntem cu toti muritori. Din punctul meu de vedere nimeni nu merita sa moara sau sa sufere dar realitatea vietii de zi cu zi este alta. Tragedia din clubul Colectiv este reala si ar trebui sa fim solidari cu victimele, rudele si prietenii acestora la fel cum ar trebui sa fim solidari cu medicii si cei ce au incercat sa ii salveze si cum ar trebui sa fim solidari cum toti oamenii de pe acest pamant ce traverseaza traume si dezastre zi de zi… caci toti suntem vulnerabili si tuturor ni se poate intampla oricand o nenorocire…Unele accidente pot fi prevenite sau se poate scadea probailitatatea ca un dezastru sa se inample dar nu putem evita totul, nu putem fi pregatiti pentru orice…este o realitate. Si nimeni nu merita sa moara la nici o varsta si totusi este atat de des spus : nu este corect, nu este drept, nu merita sa moara…Nu putem compara a cui viata este mai importanta, cea a bebelusilor morti in maternitate, cea a celor morti sau accidentanti in miile de accidente de munca sau in accidentele stradale, cei care mor la servici de suprasolicitare, cei care se sinucid caci nu mai pot suporta greutatile vietii de zi cu zi….cei care mor de foame sau de o boala oarecare...Nimeni nu merita sa moara...
Toti traim traume in viata la o scala mai mica sau mai mare, dar unde daca ne taiem la un deget, vom dezinfecta rana si vom pune un plasture, ce facem cu o trauma emotionala ? Daca avem o gripa luam paracetamoale, antibiotice, stam in casa si incercam sa ne tratam…dar ce facem cand traim, experimentam o trauma mentala ? Pierderea unei persoane dragi, stresul de la servici, conflicte in familie sau cu colegii/sefii, boala cronica, singuratatea, tristetea…furia….
Natiunea româna are talentul de a se rascula cand cutitul ajunge la os impotriva celor considerati responsabili si nu numai, mai exact impotriva tuturor. Vina este intodeauna externa lor…saracia, nevoile, adminstratia…(iar succesele individuale sunt mandria tuturor). Nu suntem unici aici, este un mecanism uman…Nu suntem unici nici in delasarea si in conceptia de face lucrurile de mantuiala…Este bine sa fim solidari, este bine sa incercam sa ajutam fiecare dupa puterile noastre…este bine chiar sa incercam sa schimbam ceva. Dar, as vrea sa le aduc aminte tuturor celor revoltati, ca marile schimbari incep cu noi insine, avaind un obiectiv si o strategie, fiind organizat si facand pasi mici in fiecare zi… De situatia actuala in Romania, in Europa, in lume..suntem cu totii responsabili prin toate obiceiurile si activitatile pe care le facem si le sustinem in fiecare zi. Cine nu a incercat si reusit sa schimbe macar un obicei in viata lui nu ar trebui sa aiba pretentii de la altii…
Cei care sunt posibili responsabili ca nu au luat toate masurile de precautie posibile ca sa evite o tragedie de proportii sunt si rezultatul (pe langa altele) al unei societati care insista sa ignore si sa nu trateze trumele mentale si emotionale. Daca va mira cat tupeu au unii si altii sa zica si sa faca, sa scrie mizerii, sa ignore ..etc, sunt rezultatul tot al aceleiasi ignorante. Igiena mentala este un lucru de care nu a auzit majoritatea….ca sa nu mai vorbim de politicieni. Sunt multe exemple din aceasta categorie care nu numai ca nu au auzit de aceasta igiena dar care sunt de-a dreptul bolnavi mintal dar sustinuti in pozitii de conducere. Nu sunt unicii…Napoleon, Hitler au fost si ei printre aceastia, dar poate in timpurile lor psihologia si psihoterapia nu erau atat de avansate…Dar in ziua de astazi este inadmisibil..si totusi cazuri deosebite sunt prezente la televizor in fiecare zi. Daca vrem ca Romania sa se schimbe, trebuie fiecare sa pornim si sa avem o igiena mentala si emotionala. Usor, usor veti vedea cum toleranta fata de cei care nu au aceasi disciplina de viata va disparea. Nu vei mai putea sa vezi la TV un Vadim (mare mi-a fost mirarea de reactiile dupa moartea lui), nici pe Ponta (care a reusit sa demisioneze iar acum se crede probabil erou national sau cel putin Isus pe cruce pentru acest « sacrificiu »)…nici macar cu Macovei (ma scuzati cei care o sustineti dar in timp ce nu ignor cariera domniei sale ca si buna ei vointa, este in momentul de fata o babuta simpatica aproape senila). S-ar putea chiar sa nu te mai poti uita in gura unor popi aberanti cu idei de ev mediu…S-ar putea sa fi mai responsabil, mai constient, mai capabil sa iei decizii in directia corecta si cu siguranta nu vei mai putea tolera prostia. Astfel, natie româna, daca chiar vrei schimbare, fiecare individual…ganditi-va, reflectati…care sunt obiceiurile de fiecare zi care te-au adus in aceasta situatie ? Care sunt traumele individuale si colective care fac sa dam vina pe oricine altcineva in afara propriei persoane ? Si mai ales dezvata-te sa crezi ca cineva acolo sus te iubeste sau te pedepseste in mod special…Dezvata-te sa crezi ca tragediile si traumele tale sunt unice si primordiale. Dezvata-te sa crezi ca statul si institutiile lui sunt o entitate extraterestra care s-a format independent de tine…
Si ca sa nu credeti eu m-as crede mai presus de toate acestea, sa stiti ca deja mi-am fact o lista de atitudini pe caree trebuie sa le schimb caci si eu am tolerat situatii absolut nesanatoase, obicei ce il am de mult dar care trebuie sustinut tout viata....

Greetings

I guess one can categorise a year as being happy or successful by looking back at its moments, being unable to decide what was more wonderful. Personally 2013 was a great year for me: traveling, collaborating with extraordinary people, learning, training and getting trained, coaching, creating, spending nice moments with family and friends. It was only one not so nice moment at the begging of the year when my last grandmother died...I was not in Europe so my family decided to tell me when I was almost back. She was buried on the same day I was getting married*. This is life. Some die, some are born...I was sad, I still am but life has to go on.
But, the purpose of this post is not to make you sad or philosophical about the normal matters of life. Its purpose is to share with you some moments of life, to celebrate the ending of the year and to look hopeful and courageous towards the new year and whatever is going to bring us. 
Traditionally there are only the happy moments because we do not make pictures when we are down, when we are in tears, in rage, when we are sad. I had these kinds of moments as well but they were all making me a better person. 
This is what I wish for everybody for the year to come: be a better person everyday. When you feel there is nothing to do, remember that humans are wired for empathy, social cooperation, and mutual aid and you will always find somebody for help, encouragement and understanding.

I wish you Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

_____________________________________________________________________
*Maybe some of you would ask how come I was getting married and I did not know about my grandma that was suppose to be at my marriage together with my family. Simply because me and my husband decided that the very act of marriage is an intimate act, that we do it for us and not for our families and other public and that probably (to read hopefully) they will understand will be happy for us and with us later on.

People and places: Back to the « normal » life

Travelling for 5 weeks could be a lot or could be not enough and becoming the beginning of willing more…When we started on the 31st of December 2012, I was thinking it is a lot. A lot of time and a lot of travelling. Now, I am back home since 2 weeks and I will start all over again, for 3 years or more :-) 

I wrote in the title back to « normal » life but in fact my life is not « normal » anymore after this trip…and there were only 5 weeks! 

Even the feeling of sleeping and waking up in my own bed is different...

Some people travel for 3, 6 months or a year…If these 5 weeks make me feel that I will travel from now on everyday of my life exploring my days like a new and most wonderful day ever…then what is happening when travelling longer? 

Must be amazing!

I grew up in these 5 weeks more then in the last five years. Meeting people from so far away, talking to them, knowing them in their everyday life it helps to realize different things, things that maybe one knows in theory but never experimented:

• all people around the world like to eat, enjoy some moments of their life with family and friends…sleep and work

• all children play and laugh in a wonderful way

• time, distances and cultural differences are RELATIVE

• everywhere are good and bad people

• learning is a process of change

• traveling is enhancing every experience helping in finding out who you really are and what you really want   

The planning of this trip started because of an old friendship and the desire of keeping it alive. It was the most important objective and together with it were coming alone the discovering and exploration of new places and people. In the same time the relationship with my partner grew stronger and our perception of the world more universal.

There are many ways of travelling and experiencing so I will not give any advice on that.

Though, I will have a suggestion: do whatever you do with the thought you are a traveller on this life and there is no need to carry the entire house with you because home is everywhere… 

Read here about: Part 1: Hong Kong, Part 3 and Part 4 Fiji, Part 5 California

People and places: Life and wild life

Seven days already in California and I can say here is life and wild life.

Seven days, driving on the cost of California from L.A. towards San Francisco with two days in Yosemite Park…

I did not write anything until now because I was hoping to understand more of the life here and change my feelings... Los Angeles immediately after Fiji was feeling like a slap in the face. Yes, here are clean hotels like I know them from Europe, yes, there is wi-fi everywhere, civilization…restaurants and expensive shops…but no humanity. Seven days in US and I did not talk to anybody then the hotel clerks, waiters or shop sellers. It is very strange though. They are all very polite and smiling. In every store one enters is welcomed with « How are you doing? » which is quite annoying…in case you are not doing well ;)

I have no story about anybody I met here, but I know there is life and wild life in California.

It is the life of humans and the life of wild animals, which are really wild, and that one can admire. Since we are here we have seen: seals, elephant seals, sea lions, sea otters, two different kinds of squirrels, condors, hawks, dolphins, pelicans, ducks and a lot of other birds I do not know the name. This is amazing here and I have never seen anywhere else until now so much wild life one can simply observe (without being in a Zoo). I felt really small in the middle of all the mightily nature in Yosemite Park and thankful I did not see the bear J.

But there is another type of wild life in California: all the homeless people that are everywhere: in the streets, in the stores, in front of the churches, in the parks etc. There are young or old, men or women…there is a huge number of them everywhere. I have even seen a small report of about 7 minutes at the main news about homeless people, entire families living in the sewers of L.A. It is because of them I did not write until now. I did not know how to write that in spite of the beautifulness of the wild nature o this part of US there is always a certain sadness filling the air… and the difference between the rich people, luxurious houses and places and the site of these homeless people is huge and extremely obvious. Only a blind could ignore it. During my life I never saw such a number of homeless people in any country of Europe, including in my own where those having my age remember the streets of Bucharest after the 90s.  I do not know why they are in this situation…I can only observe that between people with a 9 to 5 job, near reach people wearing on them more the ten thousands dollars, near all the wonderful things of California are living them: a special category of people, some having still a human look, some just deteriorating and having an empty gaze in their eyes.

More the society is “civilized”, more we are independent, “free”, less we care about the others…and still I haven’t been to Africa or India…Overall in Fiji probably were more poor people but the fact that there were living in families, villages, clans, the poorness was not so obvious because there were living a community. The lost souls of California are alone.

Seems that California (and I say California because I do not want to generalise to all US) is full of contrasts. So, yes, California is great, I have seen on one hand wonderful things but on the other hand also other kind of things showing or just confirming me that nature is better then what we call humanity…or that somehow humanity can act unnatural. 

People and places: Laughing - the best Fijian feature

The Fijians* are big, no matter if men or women. There are strong and happy. Fijians are laughing almost all the time: when working, when there is a joke, when they play or talk, when there is an embarrassing situation and even when is dangerous. They are helping and laughing…it is like a therapy: the danger does not seem so big anymore; the embarrassing situation is becoming just funny. No wonder that there are considered as one of the most happy nations. Their laugh also is from the heart; from deep down their belly…one can hear it and start laughing as well. It is like pure happiness, like there is no bad in the world, like there is just that moment going on forever.

Fijians sing a lot too. They sing when they are not laughing ;) and they do it in church as well… as Fijians are very religious.

I would like to be able to transfer the feeling I had being in this country…because I was not feeling as visiting but as being, living, changing…The way Fijians live is contagious: strongly connected to their culture, to their small piece of island, to their way of being: happy, warm and welcoming. Besides this the food is just amazing. And this again I cannot make travel through my writing: the taste of food, the smile of people and the deep happiness of the moment. The only thing I could do and I am gladly doing it is to enclose all of this in my heart, in my being, in the cells of my brain…hoping that from this small seed will grow a tree…I seed of myself, of my feelings and perceptions here about this people I met. A moment in life that I enjoyed as a saturation of natural beauty, of nice people and of love.

I came here to meet my friend from childhood, to keep this relation alive and as strong as possible. I leave with much more then that…

I’ve learned a very nice lesson from this simple living people and maybe making stronger the belief that what we call poor people live their life more fully then us, the ones from "civilized" countries. Vinaka**!

* Fijians which are not having indian origins

** Thank you in Fijian

People and places: Fabrizia from Fiji

On the 6^th of January we arrived on the main island of Fiji and we started our travelling from Nandi towards Suva stopping for a couple of days in Mango Bay.

Here is like the green house of the botanical garden: 27-29 degrees and humid, green plants everywhere, palms, papaya trees, different kind of trees with wonderful red or yellow flowers, thousand of exotic wonderful flowers.

In the first day of our arrival our friends from here took us to eat at the Eco Café of Fabrizia. I never tasted in my life such a good grilled fish with rice and, you will not believe, ferns. Seems that the local ferns are cooked a little bit steamed with coconut milk, salt pepper and is giving this amazing “contorno” as she called it. I never felt so at home… So practically we landed in a deep, wonderful Italian atmosphere surrounded by a typically Fijian environment: the house and the small restaurant are build in traditional manner with bamboo, directly on the beach, children are playing in the water…

Fabrizia is a brave, hard working, wonderful Italian woman. She married a local Fijian years ago and she build this small business: a place of Paradise that she and her husband are sharing full-hearted with their clients. Everything is home made: gorgeous lemonade, amazing marmalade, vegetables from the garden, natural growing chicken, fresh fish from the Ocean etc. Maybe you will think it must be like this everywhere on the island. Apparently not: the locals are more and more attracted if not fooled by the mirage of civilization and forgetting bit by bit their tradition. So, they started to prefer “tin houses” to the more difficult to build but much nicer bamboo houses, they prefer drinking merely Coke, Fanta or other chemicals to their natural juices (here is a paradise for bananas, pineapples, papaya and other amazing fruits).

We were going to eat there one more time, before continuing our trip. This time was a genuine Italian pizza we enjoyed in a very relaxed and happy atmosphere…I do not even remember when I laughed last time so much and so deep in my heart. 

People and places: starting and Hong Kong

I am going to start posting a few stories about our small project of travelling around the world. I say small not because the world is small but because even if we make a complete tour of the planet we stop only in Hong Kong, Fiji Islands and California (between Los Angeles and San Francisco).

We started our journey on 31st of December with a flight from London to Hong Kong. Midnight cached us in the air…almost sleeping. We just said to each other Happy New Year and we went to sleep ;) It was one of the less ceremonious New Year’s eve we have ever spent…but we were eager to arrive in Hong Kong. The start of the year was announcing itself GREAT.

On the 1^st of January we arrived in Hong Kong…and we stayed until the 5^th of January.

Hong Kong (meaning the Incense Harbour) was GREAT and did not disappoint me at all. People were smiling a lot and every time they have seen us with the map figuring out our way, they stopped and ask politely if we need help. Being jet legged had a big advantage: we were starting very early in the morning. This meant we were in the metro during the rush hour. With a population of more then 10 million people I was thinking it will be hell…worse then Rome, Paris, Bucharest and other big cities I was accustom with. In fact, not at all. No matter the hour or the place I never seen overcrowded places, I never felt aggressed or in danger. Also, I did not see angry or upset people… And I have to admit that at least the metro system was one of the most organized and I supposed the rest of the public transportation was not worse as they were very few personal cars in the city.

Every neighbourhood has its own “world”: financial place with international restaurants and stores; street markets for all kind of goods, golden fish market for aquarium fishes, flower market, traditional Chinese medicine market, dry food market, ceramics market, jade and jewellery street etc. Hong Kong has its hills with amazing nature and hiking paths, we did a few. Inside the city, wherever possible, surrounded by the forest of skyscrapers, were also parks with amazing big and almost suspended ficus trees. In these parks, the Chinese, especially the elder ones, were practicing sports of all kinds from jogging or tennis to yoga, chi qong or tai chi. Nice to see and feel this of relaxing and healthy atmosphere…Another place I liked was the sea food market. The food is also something that we enjoyed even if we were not exactly courageous in our choices: different kinds of noodle soups or dumplings, salads and some small baked bread. In any case the Chinese cuisine as I new it from Europe has not so much in commune with what I have seen on the table of the people there and in the places were they were selling the food in the street. By the way, the smell was incredible good and people were queuing to eat there.

In other words, first experience with Hong Kong: nice people, nice places to visit (we did not cover too much in our 4 days there), nice food…and for whose interested quite good for shopping.